«I believe him because of my extraordinary history. I once led the Miami Dolphins to the Superbowl Championship while I worked three jobs. I was a spinal surgeon, gentlemen's club bartender, and dancing advertising sign mascot for a tax return company. With my military experience as a Naval battleship commander, I helped build nuclear warheads. Yeah, Russia's Satan I and Satan II, that was me. I thought it was a cute moniker to scare the little people on Earth.
Anyway, after the Queen of England died from erotic asphyxiation, the royal family informed me, "Bruh, you're next in line." Ugh, that sent heebie jeebies down my spine so I turned it down and convinced them to give it to Princess Diane's murderer, Big Ear Man.
Today, I've settled down inside this compound here in Antarctica. I've been here for a few years trying to speed up climate control by setting daily fires on the icebergs. I'm hoping to raise the sea levels across the world, mainly so I can cash out with insurance claims on my thousand condominiums along the coastal areas.
Also, I created cryptocurrency in 2009, and therefore, I'm the richest person ever to walk this Earth.»
Bidens Fictional Resume is like a Comedy Skit.
«@BigJimsWornOutTireSale More believable than Fraudsident Bai Den. I remain mystified that despite Joe's Hawking-level IQ, the Secret Service never found the owner of Hunter's baggie of coke left in the WH.»
«And dumb muricans vote for him»
«@Inaminute and the other dumb americans will vote for the other retarded candidate. This world would be better off without Americans in it.»
«@luol-dengue Americans are your gods.»
«"Hilarious y'all". Fox News. Checks ALL the boxes for being a deep South trumptard MORON.»
«((( Fake fking news ))) works for shtocrats which is why we have to hear the truth from foreign sources.»
«LOL! Why get mad about it then? you voted for the lying retarded fool, just own your stupidity
»
«@wrath04 We didn't. Dumbasses, illegals and the dead voted for fuck biden.»
«I often forget how many retarded right wing cuntservative repugnant republicunt faggots there are on here. Go back to sucking dick, grandma.»
«@1mp0st3r Triggered are we?»
«@1mp0st3r Deez Nutes»
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