Drowning Woman Rescued in Comedic Fashion

«happy she's larfin'»

«IN EVENT OF WATER LANDING HOE BECOME FLOTATION DEVICE»

«Just let her drown»

«Never mind drowning. She's going to get sick from being in that dirty water. Then, she's going to the go to the airport and sneeze. And guess what happens next...»

«Is she arrive?»

«The frenzied chaos of swirling water and flailing limbs faded into a distant memory as I lay on the gravelly pavement by the retention pond, panting for breath. Big Red Floaty Thingy, my unlikely savior, sat solemnly beside me, its bright color contrasting with the murky surroundings. As the adrenaline ebbed away, a newfound clarity washed over me – a resolve to navigate life's currents with more caution and purpose.

"Thank you," I whispered to the floaty, patting its surface gratefully.

"Ayay captain," it jested in its buoyant voice inside my head, eliciting a weak chuckle from me.

From that moment on, I embarked on a journey of self-discovery, determined to redefine my priorities and steer clear of perilous distractions. No more feathers in the wind. Only solid ground beneath my feet and a clear path ahead.

Hours passed, and later that evening, I found myself perched on a bench overlooking the calm waters of the pond, reminiscing about the tumultuous events that had unfolded. Suddenly, two figures emerged from the shadows – the two strangers whose paths had crossed mine that fateful day in those cold waters of smelly neglect.

"We hope you're all right," one of them said, a glint of admiration in his eyes. "Want to have a threesome in a shithole?"

I glanced at Big Red Floaty Thingy, who winked conspiratorially in my mind. With a mischievous grin, I rose to my feet, ready to embark on a new quest of mysterious wonders, guided by lessons learned and friendships forged in the wake of watery turmoil.

And so, as darkness swallowed the sun and painted a new sky with dots of tiny lights, we walked toward the porta-potty, our laughter mingling with the soft ripples of the pond, a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the serendipitous nature of fate. Together, the three of us, one by one, stepped into the portable potty for one last adventure.»

«Diving for cellphone again huh? Being able to Swim at all is prerequisite toots»