You don't mess with the masai

«Is this Miami Beach?»

«I've seen footage of Maasai warriors killing a lion. It wasn't pretty and those fuckers can run. Running doesn't sound terrifying but it really is when all of them can do it really fast and they're all armed with spears. They are an ancient design that seems as though it hasn't been modified to the luxuries of our civilization. Even with their guns those police put themselves in a precarious situation. Luckily it looks as though the Maasai were carrying clubs instead of spears so they just knocked a few heads around. Unless you want to be the cruel bastard that mowed down a tribe with modern armament it probably best to let them be. I find certain ancient cultures to be fascinating. It would be a shame for the modern civilization to wipe them out.»

«A guy goes to Africa to teach a Native tribe how to speak English

The guy said to the chief "lion" and the chief would say Lion. The guy said "Tiger" and the chief said tiger. After a couple weeks the chief was understanding English fairly well.

The man and the chief are having a stroll down a pathway when they see a man a woman having sex in the bushes. The man was a little embarrassed so he said to the chief "man ride bicycle." The chief took out his spear and killed both of them. The guy said "Why would you do that".

The chief said "That's my bicycle he riding!" »